15 Ekim 2010

İçimdeki Hayvan

Pek çok pagan inanışı ve mit'e göre hayvanlar ve insanlar her zaman birlikte anılırlar. Güç ve kutsal durumları simgeleyen bu hayvanları bulmayı hedefleyen bir çok öğretiyi halen alan insanlar var.



Geçtiğimiz hafta uyanır uyanmaz çizdiğim rüyamı buraya koymak istiyorum.



Önce bir malikanedeyim. Ardından bir kafesin içinde duran garip bir yılan-kedi karışımı hayvanı görüyorum. Ordan uzaklaşıp bir cafeye gidiyorum. Cafede bir sekreter kuşu görüyorum. Parlak mavi tüyleri var. İçime birden bir şüphe düşüyor. Kafesteki hayvanın çalınacağını düşünüp malikaneye koşuyorum. Büyük bir üzüntüyle kafesinde olmadığını görüyorum. Çaresiz bir şekilde düşünürken bir anda bana ''Burdayım ben!'' diyor. Elimi alıp çiziyor tırnağıyla. Ayağı bir kartal ayağı gibi. İçimdeki hayvanı keşfetmemin zamanının geldiğini söylüyor.



Kendimi bir anda bir nehirde buluyorum. İlk başta biraz bocalıyorum ama sonra hayvan karakterimi keşfediyorum. Mükemmel hissederek uyandım.
-------------------------------------------------------------

There is a lot of myth about ''finding the inner animal'' thing. I had a dream about my inner animal spirit. And it was so embracing, calm and shocking experience at the same time.

In my dream; i was in a very magnificient chateau. The owner of the house is a great man. Every body look after him and try to be kind to him. When he say something, suddenly everybody feel better. And it effected on me too. After a while i understood that i m his son( or something like that) (he can be god? i dont know anyway. also don't believe in god. let just say he is Budha himself! :) )

He came to me and tell that he want to show me something special- most precious thing in this chateau. And i followed him. We were looking at a golden cage and a great creature inside! Creature looks like snake, cat, and kind of a strange bird. Feels like dragon.

I felt some kind of love. The feeling of looking at the creature was like i understand the whole meaning of life. there is a big meaning and joy beyond the mountains which i ve tried to climb.

Suddenly i've found myself in a cafe with my friends. We were drinking raki. And i remember that i've been trying to explain how beautiful creature it was.

And suddenly i heard a voices of a bird. that was a ''Sagittaridae bird'' he has a bright feathers and trying to tell me something important. I felt like there is something about the creature in the chateau. I ve found myself in panic and went to the chateau.

When i arrived there is no creature in the cage. I felt terrible. Feel guilty a little bit to leave him alone there. And i heard a magical voice of him. He says '' I'm here'' when i saw him he was really close to me. and he hold my hand. Find my reflexology point of my hand. that point about brain. he damaged and make it bleed. at the same time he said'' now it's time to find your animal spirit'' he was calm and trustworthy. i felt like i m going to die or something. But it was still make me feel like i m on my path. it s normal. it has to be done. i close my eyes for a second....

When i opened my eyes i found my self on a river. and there was a waterfall in front of me. i m feeling like i m about the fall and die. and suddenly i understood that i m a free beautiful grey dolphin! i felt like i ve found myself. rest is meanless. now. this moment is my moment!

i swam like i ve always been a real dolphin. and it was the most exiting experience in my hole life.

i tried to draw the thing to remember in the future. i have a small sketchbook about my dreams. but it s in turkish. i ll translate like this. i know my english killed you. but i think you understood :)













2 yorum:

El Quinto dedi ki...

son sayfayı çok sevdim ben. o tek bile olabilir.

ALAN KÉLDYSH dedi ki...

♥!
http://alankeldysh.blogspot.com